Propaganda

So I was writing up my speech on why grade 9's should take tech. And to be honest, it felt like half the stuff was just propaganda. Haha, maybe it was?

You can learn to do it all!

Anyways.

Today was really, really great. I absolutely insist that we do it again soon, and I'm more than willing to donate my mattresses to the cause! Hanging out with you two was very excellent, I'm quite looking forward to tomorrow...and the next day...and the many rehearsals and performances after that lol.


Sorry, I hope I didn't seem too pushy with what I said yesterday, but honestly, I think that you need to do what you've told yourself you will (in your good time). Sometime soon we need to have another Starbucks afternoon, ok?


I miss you so much. Did you know that there is a month and 26 days left until March 23rd? Well now you do, and I can't wait for that day (or any day yet to be determined around that time). It's been way too long (5 months 24 days actually), and I don't want to keep going on like this, wondering how long I'll have to wait before I can know and feel it. I guess the things we want the most demand the greatest patience?


Maybe it's because we watched 3 action movies today, but I started to think that everything I said (over MSN at that) sounded deep and intense.

Blah blah blah metaphors about building things up, and the difficulties involved blah blah blah how eventually they all end up falling down anyways blah blah

you have to keep building these things until one of them can stand on it's own.

Oooh, epic!
At least, in my head it was...


Ok, either I'm suddenly really tired, or..I don't even know what. I just suddenly felt like crying? Odd.


Tomorrow will be a good day I think. Perhaps once I finish replying I'll go to bed. That or I could watch another episode of House...can you guess which one?


And of course, I'm obliged to post this. Have at 'er
(Feel free to write more than just the usual point form, because short answer, long answer, and even essay responses are always enjoyed...)


1. The love of my life.
2. Where you and I met.
3. Take a stab at my middle name.
4. How long you've known me?
5. The last time that we saw each other.
6. Would I ever go sky diving?
7. Your first impression of me upon meeting me/seeing me.
8. Am I funny?
9. My favorite type of music.
10. Can I sing?
11. The best feature about me.
12. What do I want to do more than anything?
13. What is one thing that you think I should do?
14. Do I have any special talents? If so, what are they?
15. Would you call me preppy, average, sporty, punk, hippie, glam, nerdy, snobby, or something else?
16. Have you ever hugged me?
17. My favorite food.
18. Have you ever had a crush on me?
19. If there was one good nickname for me, it would be.
20. Your favorite memory of me.
21. If you and I were stranded on a desert island, what would I would bring?
22. Do I believe in God?
23. Who is my best friend?
24. Will you re-post this so I can fill this out for you?

:)

Today has been a rather good day in some regards.

Just surpassed 33,000 words, or 82 pages. Wow.
169 days of communication.
176 days since the trip ended.
57 days until spring break!

How am I going to make it that long? I really hope February goes by quickly...

In no particular order

Lookin' for a breakthrough

What's it going to take? So many things still to do, to say, to be.

I just wish I could show you how much you've missed. Please just don't end the great thing you already have.

Let's listen to 'em all

Working on listening to every song on my iPod, here's my progress so far

1. A-Tisket, A-Tasket; Ella Fitzgerald; Best of Big Bands
   
2. Abandoned Masquerade; Diana Krall; The Girl in the Other Room
   
3. Above All; Michael W. Smith; Worship
   
4. Above All; Michael W. Smith; Worship (2 versions? Odd..)
5. Across the Universe; Jim Sturgess; Across the Universe OST
   
6. Ad Arcana; Hans Zimmer; The Da Vinci Code
7. Adagio Molto E Cantabile; Cleveland Orchestra; Symphony No.9 (Since when do I have this?)
8. Adeste Fideles; Boston Brass; Stan Kenton Christmas Carols
9. African Rundown; David Arnold; Casino Royale
10. Against the Wind; Bob Seger; Forrest Gump Soundtrack
11. Agent of Chaos; Hans Zimmer; The Dark Knight
12. Aggressive Expansion; Hans Zimmer; The Dark Knight
13. Agnus Dei; Michael W. Smith; Worship
14. Agnus Dei; Third Day; Exodus
15. Agnus Dei I; Canadian Brass; Sacred Brass
16. Agnus Dei II; Canadian Brass; Sacred Brass (See a pattern by any chance?)
17. Ain't Misbehavin'; Louis Armstrong; 16 Most Requested Songs
18. Ain't No Sunshine; Eva Cassidy; Time After Time
19. Ain't Nobody But Me; Supetramp; The Very Best Of Supertramp
20. Air On A G String; Canadian Brass; Amazing Brass
21. Alive; Melissa O'Neil; Melissa O'Neil
    
22. Alive; S Club 7; BEST (Shut up Aaron...)
    
23. All I Ask of You; Andrew Lloyd Webber; Phantom of the Opera
24. All I Ask of You (Reprise); Andrew Lloyd Webber; Phantom of the Opera
    
25. All I Care About; James Naughton & Girls; Chicago
    
26. All I Have To Give; Backstreet Boys; Backstreet's Back
    
27. All My Bells Are Ringing; Lenka; The Hotel Cafe Presents Winter Songs
28. All My Loving; Jim Sturgess; Across the Universe
29. All of Me; Louis Armstrong; 16 Most Requested Songs
30. All Of Them!; Hans Zimmer; King Arthur
    
31. All Or Nothing At All; Diana Krall; Love Scenes
    
32. All Right Here; Sara Groves; All Right Here
33. All Right Now; Free; 70s Gold
34. All That Jazz; Bebe Neuwirth & Company; Chicago
35. All The Drains Lead To The Ocean; Thomas Newman; Finding Nemo
36. All the Things You Never Wanted; Peirson Ross; All the Things You Never Wanted
37. All The Way To Kingdom Come; Rich Mullins; The Jesus Record
38. All You Need Is Love; 1; The Beatles
39. Allegro Ma Non Troppo E Un Poco Maestoso; Cleveland Orchestra; Symphony No.9
40. 
    

*Gasp*

I've been tagged! Imagine that! Let's skip the usual copy/pasted intro, and dive right into these points.

1. I am going to force myself to only do one of these at a time, and study between each one so that I don't totally waste all my time. You see, I have an awful thing called a math exam tomorrow, and to tell the truth, I'm nowhere near ready. I'm still learning how to use the formulas again, and I need to work on conics, trig, and combinatronics of all things. Maybe a little more on logs too, though I finally cracked them I think. I guess we'll see what happens tomorrow though, hopefully it isn't TOO bad...
2. I fail at making deals with myself. Though I did learn the difference of a and b in a hyperbola, so I guess that counts for something. And in the mornings, I'll set my alarm for a reasonable time, but then it doesn't matter what I do, I just cannot get out of bed. I set about 6 more timers after the initial alarm, promising myself that after the next one, I'll get up. And yet, when I finally do get up, it's never as bad as I expect it to be.
3. Excited beyond belief about going to Vancouver over spring break. It's been all I can think about lately, I just...yeah. I need to make a fair chunk of money, but I think that if I can talk my parents into letting me miss 2 days of school (in February no less), then I'll get paid to do 4 shows, and make enough to get me there. Whenever I think about it actually working, about being able to see a dream I've had for so long come true, I just get so...happy. "I just want to see you too :)"
4. To tell the truth, I'm really not looking forward to grad pictures in a way. I know that a lot of people dislike being in front of the camera, and there's not a lot that can be done. I've always hidden behind my camera, taking pictures of other people so they don't take any of me. I've just always had a really hard time liking my appearance, because the thing I see in the mirror does nothing to reflect how I precieve myself from the inside.
5. I have to wear these really annoying clear plastic retainers, and I just keep pulling them off, then putting them back on, etc. They're also really gross right now, because I just had dinner and didn't feel like brushing my teeth for the 4th time today. So now it's just...pleasant.
6. I think I'm allergic to aspartame. Today I had a whole package of gum with aspartame in it (I have a terrible habit of just eating it, and swallowing it in bits until I've had the whole package). And so now I'm starting to have some not-so-pleasant side-effects. No more gum for a while.
7. I am rather scared of a few things, though I don't tell people most of them. I'm horribly afraid of train crossings though. Ever go on YouTube and see those videos of people almost getting hit by trains? Yeah, those scare me a lot. That and I'm scared to give my friends too much relationship advice, because I'm afraid that if they follow my advice, and things go south in their relationships, then they'll become upset with me, whether consciously or unconsciously.
8. I have never kissed someone outside of my family. Some days, that really bothers me. To the point of insanity almost, where seeing anyone, even my best friends, kissing someone, just makes me want to scream. It seems like something so special, so intimate, that I want to just have a bit of it in my life. And I get even more annoyed at the people who don't take it seriously, to either extreme. You get the people who kiss like there's no tomorrow, getting all over each other's faces in the middle of the halls, making lovely sloppy kissing noises while they're at it, and then the people who just take it for granted, not even seeming to notice when they've been kissed. I just want to experience it at some point in my life I guess. Oh, and then other days, I could care less :P
9. I have a strange addiction to Starbucks. And really, it only started this year. I mean, I've dished out hundreds to that delicious company, and it's more than a little stupid. But I just can't help it, I keep going back for more. It's not just the drink either. I'm convinced that a large part of the addiction is psychological. You don't see people getting addicted to Tim Hortons coffee, do you? No, it's because with starbucks you get the psychological bonus of knowing you spent more money, and it makes you feel a little more special when you walk down the street with that signature paper cup (I'm annoyed that they're still using Christmas cups though).
10. I get paranoid really, really easily. If someone texts me something that sounds even a little upset, I instantly assume that I've done something to them. Things like, "sounds good", "alright", "no worries", and even a "you too" at times can set me off. It just feels dismissive in a sense, and I worry that people don't want to talk to me. It's probably not true most of the time, but I get really paranoid.
11. Working on my light show for grade 9 tours right now, and I'm really happy with it so far. I'm doing it to a piece from the Dark Knight soundtrack, and so I'm attempting to light the theatre accordingly. Spent most of the afternoon working on various things to get the light show ready to go, and I'll be spending the next few days in the theatre preparing it for next Thursday.
12. My parents have been pressuring me a lot lately to get a job. Truth is though, I can't handle one right now. Tech is a full time job shoehorned into a part time schedule. As much as I need the money, I don't have the time to take one on. That and I just can't get motivated to go out and get one. I sent in a resume to Vertigo Theatre, but something tells me I won't be hearing from them anytime soon, which is really unfortunate. I was in a rush to go do tech (irony much?), so I didn't bother to write a good cover letter, which probably didn't help my professional appearance much. So hopefully I can actually make enough money to get me out to BC this time around...
13. I have a very full schedule at the moment. Most of it is light show programming at this point (I'm revising my time to work ratio to something more like 10 seconds per hour...). But then again, a fair chunk of it is hanging out with friends, something I'm quite looking forward to.
14. I just got the warm fuzzies :) All it takes is one email to make my day. Thankfully they come on a fairly regular basis, provided I reply.
15. I feel like such a psychologist at times. I ask all these questions to try to understand what's bothering people. I mean, I can almost imagine people lying on a couch, telling me all these things in person rather than through MSN. Me asking all these questions in that soothing voice, encouraging them to explain further. And yet I don't want to be like that. I want to be a friend, not a psychologist.
16. Maybe I'm just going a little insane over here, but I just can't stop thinking about it. Had a nice little Freudian slip whilst typing the word "kidding"...maybe you can figure where that one went. That's a little bit creepy though, isn't it? The fact that it seems to be at the forefront of my mind? I don't want it to be, and I like to think that it isn't.
17. I have a ton of paperwork to do for work experience. I need to do my big booklet of assignments, then finish hour sheets, plus grade 9 tours means a few sheets of paper to be distributed, and then before you know it, we'll be right into Witness. This treadmill never seems to stop.
18. I love photography, but lately I've pretty much cast it off to the wayside for a while. Maybe it's because I've been so busy with tech, but I just haven't taken the time to take any pictures lately. Kinda sad if you ask me, but hey, what can you do?
19. I have grad pictures tomorrow, and I'm kind of wondering what I should wear...I need to find some nicer jeans, pick a tie (yes, I have more than one of my own), and figure out what colour I want. Oh the decisions.
20. And now I'm a little rushed to just get this over with. Gah, I miss her. Post = over!
    

Love and War

I came across this 'animated opera' a few minutes ago whilst being distracted from studying. I just find it so beautiful that, even though it's in a language that I cannot understand at all, I understand it completely.

Another *sigh*

Of course, I'm not allowed to talk to anyone about it, but to tell the truth, that's fine by me. I just hope that I'm not leading my friends astray.

Try to make ends meet

I guess it's been a while since I last posted something. Although to be honest, I'm just avoiding studying math, and being bugged about getting a job, and just human interaction overall. I really have no idea why, I just don't want to talk to anyone right now, so I'm sitting alone in my room, being bored.

Online communication overall right now just seems to be lacking a lot. These past few days I've just avoided going online on MSN, but I don't know why. Just not a whole lot to say other than "how goes studying?" I have messages sitting in my inbox that I just haven't felt like replying to, even though there's no reason why I shouldn't. I don't mind hanging out and talking with people in person, it's really quite fun and enjoyable actually, but as soon as we enter the digital realm, I get bored and avoid it.

I was telling someone (you) the other day about how they (you) shouldn't lose heart when they're (you're) in a long distance relationship, and don't hear from their (your) significant other for a few days. And yet, after telling them (you) that, I realized that I'm guilty of the same thing right now. It's been 4 days since I last heard anything from her, and even though I know I shouldn't be bothered by it, that I should just understand that this is how it works, it still gets to me. I guess the biggest problem I have with it is not that she's taking a little longer than usual to reply, but the number of times that I've just been too tired to reply to her.

As soon as I finish this, I think I'll go work on my resume for a bit. My mom somehow found out that the Vertio Theatre is looking for people on their casual crew list, so I'm going to apply and see if they'll take me. Age is one thing that isn't going to be a huge help in this job however. Then I'll also do an application for starbucks, and ask at Best Buy and the Library. Ugh, I hate money.

Applied at Mount Royal and Red Deer yesterday. Really hoping for Mount Royal though, I'd have a really hard time affording res and tuition in Red Deer. And now I need to get working on a portfolio of my work so that I can actually get into the program. Now I'm just wondering if my marks are going to be good enough to get in...

Tomorrow is going to be great, I'm really looking forward to just getting into set building, and finally seeing it all come together. Hopefully my set design actually works the way I want it to

And I guess I haven't really told anyone what's happening with visiting, not that it really matters to most people. Obviously I'm not going next week, it didn't work out, which really bothers me. But as far as can be determined, I think spring break is the aim, meaning I finally have a really big incentive to earn some money.

Bleah, now I'm bored of writing in my blog. This is getting really stupid. I jst want to go to sleep. Maybe I will. Or maybe I'll get bored of sleeping too.

Hmm, I just realized it's been a whole 2 days since I last wrote in this.